The Lazy Yogi

the-mind-is-a-parachute asked: I am often bi-polar in nature when it comes to self-esteem, and from reading your answers to other questions I have gathered that it's because I'm unsure of who I truly am. How does one begin the process of discerning their true disposition from the lies they tell themselves, and how would one refine their meditation to focus on self-exploration? Namasté. :)

It is good to hear that you have found this insight into your confusion. Knowing who you truly are means connecting with your primary feeling of being alive, of existence. It is not an intellectual endeavor. 

Anything you tell yourself is a fiction. This is apparent by the simple fact that it’s a voice in your head. We have a habit of assuming that voice is who we are. Don’t look to the mind for truth. All it can do is make clear what is untrue, unreal, not you. 

You are the Real. And nothing can make the Real more real. Rather than a journey of transformation, the spiritual path is more like a circuitous journey of self-discovery. It can seem like a long route but the reality is that you are already That which you are seeking. 

Meditation doesn’t need refining. Sit down, close the eyes, and be. If thoughts come, witness. If feelings are there, witness. That is all. 

I would also recommend the book The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. 

Namaste :)

allycatbradley asked: Is there a certain time of day that is best for meditation? ~namaste

Meditate any time of day. Then you will see that time is not real. It is a thought. 

When your attention is wholly within yourself, where is time? Where is past, present, and future? There is just this. 

Time, space, these things are appearances. You experience them when you dream at night. But who were you before the world was seen? It is also who you are now, and eternally. 

Namaste!

cherchezlafemmeaa asked: Two questions! What advice do you have for beginners in meditating and what is your favorite thing about mediation?

Advice for beginning meditation:

1. Meditate every day. If you miss a day, don’t sweat it. Use that to solidify your resolve to meditate when the next opportunity presents itself. 

2. Don’t waste time wondering if you’re doing it right while you are sitting in meditation. That is like constantly taking a cake out of the oven to see if it’s cooking right. 

3. Meditation is not an altered state nor a trance. It is the serene alertness you have here and now. It’s not about sinking to a level below thoughts but rather being so attentive that there is no place for thoughts to stick. 

4. Don’t try to clear your mind. Do not deliberately think about anything, just attentively rest in observation. If thoughts come, don’t reject them. But don’t entertain them either. Let them go in the same way that they arrived, which they will do on their own if you don’t react to and analyze them. 

5. Don’t judge your meditation. If you feel good, meditate. If you feel bad, meditate. If the meditation feels peaceful, cool. If it feels horrible, cool. Just as meditation is not about having a particular thought, it is also not about having a particular feeling. Once you stop fixating on the idea of gaining a particular thought or feeling from meditation, you start to develop equanimity. 

6. Read spiritually inspiring books daily. It can be a paragraph or a chapter, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that there is a constant influx of insight and inspiration helping you. 

7. Be grateful for your practice. Meditation is a privilege and a blessing. Every time you sit for a meditation, some of your confusion burns away. Even if you aren’t aware of it, it is happening. Like my guru says, it is like a fixed deposit. 

As for my favorite thing about meditation? It keeps everything in perspective. 

Namaste :)

eatsavvy asked: Hi Lazy. Please tell me; why do I pray?

Why does it matter? Just pray.

"The usual condition attained by man engaged in meditation or in works with an eye on reward, can be described in words; the unique condition attained by the yogi, engaged in meditation or work, without an eye on reward, is beyond description." ~ The Avadhuta Gita

Namaste

asparklingmoment asked: What is the difference between love and lust?

Lust arises in the body and mind. It never extends beyond that level. This is because lust gets off on the notion of separation and bridging that perceived distance. You are not the body nor mind.

Love, on the other hand, radiates from your very being. Your awareness is that which shines love onto the mind and body. No matter how much others love you, the only love you ever feel is the love that wells up from within.

Therefore lust depends on certain conditions while love does not. People who vacillate in relationships don’t really know what they want, as they are caught between the pull of lust and the wish for genuine love. That is why I often recommend that people take time alone to develop their own relationship with love before seeking to share that with another.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying lust, just as there is nothing wrong with enjoying human life. But if you cling to it and narrow your world to be defined by it, you will suffer.

Satisfying lust thoroughly is not always possible, since conditions are always changing. But love is always possible because it is inseparable from who you are.

Namaste!

omgartnshit asked: I've been reading your posts and really enjoying them, they're all so insightful :) Why did you start practicing yoga and what got you hooked?

If you’re referring to physical yoga, I started last August. Between being unemployed, directionless, and split from my ex, I was in a pretty rough place back then. Going to yoga every other day helped me to release some of the emotional tension built up in my body. 

It proved to be a useful space both physically and mentally in which to keep things in perspective. It also started helping me feel better about myself, gaining a trusting relationship with my body and appreciating the way it changed shape with the regularity of my practice. 

As for meditation and spirituality in general, I started getting into them with real sincerity in college. My father died the summer before my senior year in high school, then one of my best friends took his own life a few years later. The reality and finality of death was something I couldn’t sanely accept without further investigation. So I investigated. 

Because I wanted insight as opposed to answers, religion wasn’t enough for me. I needed my own understanding. Eventually this led me to meditation. The right circumstances met with the right teachers and soon I was meditating daily. 

I’m hooked for the simple reason that sanity is tasty. 

Namaste :)

chellybelly420 asked: What would be your advice to helping someone get into meditation?

I just try to be encouraging. Anyone can meditate, it’s free, and it will benefit you in ways that you can’t even fathom. 

With that attitude, I openly share my own appreciation for meditation. But it often just feels like talking about your favorite movie. Some people are indifferent, other people hate it, some saw it in theaters and liked it but haven’t seen it since, and then finally there are the very few who, upon hearing about it, sprint home to download the shit out of it. 

So don’t worry about it. Lead by example, keep up with your own daily practice, become so luxuriously sane that people feel the need to ask you for your secret, and always encourage others. 

The rest is up to itself. 

Namaste :)

salehabhatti asked: Namaste! I've been reading your blogs for a while, and I absolutely love the advice you give, it's helped me quite a bit. My question is, how do I beat the inner turmoil? I'm always at war with myself.

You create the turmoil and then ask how to beat it. You can’t beat it, you can only stop creating it. 

If you are frolicking in a pond, ripples and waves are being made. Can you force the pond to be still? No. All you can do is stop making waves and then wait with patience while the waters still. 

This is because that stillness is the water’s natural state. Similarly, peace and clarity is your natural state. When you stop obscuring that with your own reactivity to fears, desires, perceptions, and so on, then peace resumes itself naturally. 

Don’t aim for peace and don’t try to conquer the waves. Just be still and patient. Practicing daily meditation and constant mindfulness is the way. 

Namaste my friend :)

notoriouslyidiosyncratic asked: Dear Lazy Yogi, I am trying to change my life. Trying to rid myself of certain habits that are not true to my heart... It seems I always feel too obligated to other people to make the changes necessary. Some people seem to help and hurt too, they're the ones that confuse me the most. I'm trying to figure out how to let go of being a people pleaser, to stand up for myself, and to not give in time and time again.

From a young age, many of us were taught to refrain from causing harm to other people. However, there is a difference between causing harm and allowing displeasure. 

Pleasure comes from circumstances being perceived in an acceptable way to the mind. Displeasure comes from those circumstances being judged as unacceptable. As both pleasure and displeasure are the result of the judgmental mind, you are responsible for neither when it comes to another person. 

The opposite of harming someone is helping someone. But pleasure is not what helps someone. You are not helping people by pleasing them. This doesn’t mean to say you can only help people by displeasing them. Rather, pleasure and displeasure do not enter into the equation when it comes to helping others. 

Consider both a mother and a doctor. Both have their charge’s best interest at heart. The mother wants what’s best for her child and the doctor wants what’s best for her patient. That focus of what is best takes primary importance over what pleases the child or patient. 

You aren’t giving in and being weak, you are just trying to help in the way you think is best. However, it isn’t working. Does a mother need to stand up to her child? Of course not, she is the child’s alpha and omega. It is by her grace that the child lives, and the same goes for the doctor. 

You do not need to stand up and assert yourself. You need only to refrain from indulging the urge to cater to the pleasures of others. Don’t look for recognition, acceptance, validation, or approval from any of the people for whom you feel that urge. The more thoroughly you detach yourself from that identity-seeking delusion, the less you will feel moved to please them. 

“Even as a solid rock is unshaken by the wind, so are the wise unshaken by praise or blame.” ~ Buddha

Stop being hooked to people for either help or harm. When it comes to changing your inner life, you are the master. What power others seem to have is only what you have knowingly or unknowingly given them due to your estimation of them. 

Meditate daily. Practice tonglen. Read The Places That Scare You by Pema Chodron. 

You will know where to go from there. 

Namaste :) much love

To heal from ego means to stop taking its temperature.