The Lazy Yogi

yesherenow-deactivated20120715 asked: It feels as if I'm making the same mistake over and over again and although I could forgive myself once I can't anymore. How can I forgive myself totally if I can't help but involuntarily repeat the same mistake only in different contexts?

It is good that you cannot forgive the involuntary repetition of mistakes. But there’s no need to be hard on yourself about it. 

The energy that is tied up in unforgiveness will prevent you from shedding this unconscious habit. In fact, the unforgiveness itself will become part of that habit and can create a deepset feeling of self-loathing. 

The only useful way of proceeding is to channel that attention and focus into emerging from this involuntary repetitious pattern. 

Lack of forgiveness is no different than dwelling in the past. To forgive is to become present. Whether or not you forgive yourself, the past is the past. The past only follows you to the extent that you carry it with you. 

Meditation will give you the rootedness you need to empty yourself of compelling drives. Mindfulness will give you the presence in the moment to know when to let go instead of giving in to repetition. 

Eckhart Tolle speaks wonderfully on the ticks and tricks the mind/ego uses to keep you in unconscious habit. You would benefit greatly from his book The Power of Now. 

Namaste :)